complainingjane

I am not a decent liar. Really I can’t lie at all and have someone believe me. I’m not sure if it’s because the look on my face afterwards isn’t convincing, or I don’t look at them enough, or if I just happen to pick terrible things to lie about, in which everyone knows the truth. Maybe it’s that I’m too cute. I can’t seem to swear either and have it sound at all decent, so I have stopped even trying.

So the other day we saw this movie, The Invention of Lying. It really got me thinking about what life would be like if no one really could lie. In the movie all their movies were boring and based on history and just had someone reading them. Everyone was very blunt. Sharing details we usually don’t share. I’m not sure that’s how things would really be, if everyone told the truth. I don’t think I’d want everyone to know every piece of information about me, or what I was planning on doing every moment of every day. Though the thoughts of religion came up, and everyone thought that you went to nothingness. Because no one knew for sure what happened. So you couldn’t tell your idea, because it wasn’t actual truth. It may have been to you, but I’m not sure. No one really thought for themselves, just did what someone else told them was best.

Which got me to thinking. My husband is very adamant about me making my own decisions. He knows I’ll be left alone quite a bit, and he wants to make sure I’ll be okay. So sometimes, even when I have such a hard time making a decision he still wants me to give my opinion. Which is hard for me, I found out, because I have a balanced brain. Most people are either right or left brained. Meaning that they either think mostly creatively or logically. So when left brained people make a decision they use logic to help, and with creative people they use whatever appeals to them. Well, when you think with both, you have different answers come up, and that makes things conflicted. So I try being honest with my husband that I like both things. That they both are appealing, and he gets frustrated. He is a left brained thinker.

But I know it’s important for someone to be able to trust you, that you be honest. So I’ve been trying to kick the habit I have of lying. Everyone knows when I am, and everyone is more apt to talk to you when you are honest. I am really liking how this whole thing is working out, and my relationship with everyone has gotten better. In fact, it feels a hundred times better to be honest. I don’t have to worry about which lie I’ve told, though I really couldn’t remember them and keep them straight anyway. So I’m turning into an honest nelly. Which I hope won’t cause me to start spouting off details I really would rather have hidden, like that I have a third eye or something like that. Though if I did have a third eye, everyone would be able to see it anyway. Darn.

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